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A Penguin Plays RULE THE WAVES

As a WoWS player, it always amuses me to remember that 12 inch guns made for the biggest armament to float on the Seven Seas at one time. *sneers in Stalingrad*
 
As a WoWS player, it always amuses me to remember that 12 inch guns made for the biggest armament to float on the Seven Seas at one time. *sneers in Stalingrad*
Huh. How long did that last, historically?
 
39.1 Spain - May 1908
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We don't have enough of a Dreanought fund.
We're going to have to stop doing this after... five months?

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Unless I can blackmail bait the Cortes into giving me more funding.

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Let's see it.

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You've done good!

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What's that? Another of the COLBERT class the same way the British are buying up more RESOLUTION class?

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Oh my.

The BB OCEAN is of the OCEAN class and would probably be the best ship afloat in 17 months, other than its mediocre B speed.
But that's the same speed as the BB RESOLUTION class anyway.

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It would be best if we waited until BB BARBARA is in service.

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But we're definitely going there.

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Syet, the pastabotes are wise to us.

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Ven a mi hermano!/Vieni da me fratelloooo!
 
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Wait, in the previous update you had enough to build a dreadnought. What changed?
 
Wait, in the previous update you had enough to build a dreadnought. What changed?
Nothing, it's just BB Barbara's monthly build cost.

4 million / 898k = 4.45 months.
 
39.2 Spain - May 1908
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Those were some very productive three months, and now it's May.

Tensions against Italy has risen, but there was a slight bump in funding.
 
40.1 Spain - June, July 1908
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We're going to have to stop BB construction after this, but let's see it.

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Good enough.

1% of 20,000 tons is 200 tons. That could mean another extra inch of turret armor.

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That's a RESOLUTION class, 13 inch gun, 19 knot speed, 10 1/2 inch belt.
Don't care.

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(sigh)
And we pause construction of the BB again.

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I... won't try to take over Albania this run.
I'm keeping to the west side of the Mediterranean.

The Balkans can go hang.

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Wait. I remember that.
It's 9000 tons, three nine-inch guns, 18 knots speed, and 6 1/2 belt.

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Yup.
That's the crappiest B in existence.

And like the UK with their odd insistence on the RESOLUTION class, they've got a bunch of em.


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Tensions increased with both Austria-Hungary and Italy for reasons.
 
Guess they didn't like your comment about the murder in the Balkans.
 
41.1 Spain - August, September 1908
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You already gave me this info, what the heck are you doing in pasta land?

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... (checks the almanac)

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Oooh. It is the only BB they have in production.
So my spahs can't tell me anything else about their newest battlewagon.


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Now that's a nicer surprise!

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Hmm.
No we need to build funding a little more.

One more month should do it.

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I have tons of prestige.
If this will lower tensions with anyone else other than France, that would be a good deal.

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Or we could get naked bribery from their Jeune Ecole school that would be fine too.

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Nice. It's not more range and accuracy, but a worthwhile improvement across the board anyway.

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Well keeping tensions low with France means a more stable option for building our new BBs with their 14-inch guns.

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-350 million is super sustainable though.
Our monthly budget increased from 4.49 million in July to 4.65 million in September.

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What the hey, let's go build a couple of Coastal Submarines so that our torpedo technologies aren't wasted.
 
23 knots? This da Vinci looks pretty dangerous IMO. Gotta hope you don't face it without good naval superiority.
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We have a BB, and will have two BB in 9 months, while Italy doesn't have a BB (but my spies don't say until when).
 
42.1 Spain - October to December 1908
AN: Mmm yeah that's definitely typhoon rain heaviness going on there. Time to post!



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ONORE, LUPIN!

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You think you bunch of failed male prostitutes can try to muscle in to my scams and get off free?

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Phrasing.

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Dang.
Would putting vessels built to round off hulls for Coastal Patrol duty on Reserve Fleet prevent this?

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Wait hang on-

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DORITO hulls are 1700 tons made to serve Foreign Service duty!
That actually makes them valuable!

I would happily lose a DD sooner than a MS!

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Yes, I just said that.

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RICHELIEU class? What's that?
 
42.2 Spain - December 1908
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Hmm.

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Much faster than the OCEAN class, though not as well protected.
It seems more an evolution of the COLBERT class and would be a significant threat to any ships of the Royal Navy.

It has no serious flaws and would be better built in numbers as the core of the navy.

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US... you are doing something and I'm not sure I like it.

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Tensions are dangerously high now...
But I need about seven months to build and work up BB BARBARA.
 
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43.1 Spain - February, March 1909
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That's fine. Everyone has terrible torpedoes anyway.

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That reminds me - why are we having our BBs built in the UK anyway instead of France?
I just remembered the British ships are supposed to have 'hidden flaws'.

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Ah right. Now I remember.
I don't know what an SFAX is, but it was the fear of our warships being accidentally turned into penis ships.

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Man you are so eager to please.

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Very good.

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Two more months, baby.
Two more months!
 
43.2 Spain - February, March 1909
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We don't even have oil, so that doesn't matter.

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I have a strange feeling you're trying to run our submarines off distilled alcohol.
You are not Scots. Cease.

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One month!
We're at the brink of war here!
 
So how strong is Italy now compared to the last war?
 
44.1 Spain - April 1909
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Yes!
Come on Barbie let's go party!

>> BB BARBARA> I'm a material girl in a material world.
>> BB BARBARA> Time to loot and plunder.


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Good. Good.
Dying in a submarine is one of the most terrifying ways to go.

Cold, coffin of steel
Silent, scratching in the dark
Down, to eldritch depths we go
Crushed by the weight of the world.


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Not as big as a problem as well since everybody's got shitty short range subs for now.

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Another mine sweeper gone!
How do I stop these old ships from wearing out?!

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That was even a Foreign Service ship.
Although that would explain the terrible maintenance.

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Let's put Furiosa on Foreign Service.
Fantastica is already in South East Asia, so she might go to Cuba.

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MUY BUENO!
We need most of our guns in front anyway, the superimposed X turret is only good for broadsides.

So maybe 3 gun forward turret + 2 gun midships + 2 gun aft.

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What.
 
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41.1 WAR! - Spain vs Italy - Cruiser Action off Eastern Spain
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.


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It's FURIOSA.

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Wait, aren't you on Foreign Service?
Why are here and not Cuba?!

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>> CL FURIOSA> I'm furious that I won't get to hunt the enemy.

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I see.

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Wait, that's not a DD.

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It shouldn't be a match for FURIOSA anyway.

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You're only about as fast as each other though.

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By heedlessly going north at max speed while forcing CA FURIOSA to turn, the CL BRINDISI-class was able to extend the range.

>> CA FURIOSA> It's not a problem.

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>> CA FURIOSA> Ok this might be a problem.
 
41.2 WAR! - Spain vs Italy - Cruiser Action off Eastern Spain
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Just keep on that BRINDISI, ignoring all considerations!

>> CA FURIOSA> Aye aye, admiral.

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>> CA FURIOSA> Closing range.


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>> CA FURIOSA> This is a tricky one, going north and then south again.
>> CA FURIOSA> Spotted unknown ships.

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It's just the DD squadron from before, don't worry about it.


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Ohohoho NOPE.
 
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